The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," he replied
"How can you be so sure," she protested. "I mean, you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, returning a few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table, walked softly around the bird, and also sniffed delicately. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."
Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!” she cried, $150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"
The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd have taken my word for it, the bill would have been only $20, but with the “Lab” report and the “Cat Scan,” the prices go way up!"
Reprinted from Grace Drops, Volume 4 (2006).